Walking through the halls of LG this morning, I was flooded with nostalgia when I turned towards the main office and saw the cardboard cut outs, crepe paper, banners, and balloons...spirit week. An infamous week at this small-town school that gets every student, and several teachers, in the mood to compete with their fellow classmates. I remember spirit week being the best time of my high school career and to come back and get to relive it is amazing.
Each day, we have a "theme" for spirit week- today is Neon Day. All I have to say is thank God for Forever 21 and the return of the 80's! Luckily, I had an awesome tshirt left over from my "Fanny Pack" costume from last year's teacher talent show which I donned this morning with my dark jeans, old-school Nike high-tops, and a bright purple hoodie. Only problem is...I fit in with the students in the hallway a LITTLE too much. I'll be excited to return to my business casual look next week, which adds at least 5 years to my appearance.
So far, these students have been awesome. I love their personalities. In fact, so many of the students at LG can make me laugh! For example, I subbed last Thursday for sophomore English and, as always, I wrote my name up on the white board. When the students arrived, I did my normal shpeal and when I said "My name is Ms.." and went to point to my name on the white board, the sliding board had MOVED behind the projector screen so my response was "Whoa!"...of course the students burst into chorus, "Ms. Whoa!!!" Later, when they were being too loud, I yelled at them angrily. It was silent for a few seconds and then one boy said "Whoa...Ms. Whoa". How could I keep my stern face! Now I have a soft spot for the students who pass me in the halls and say "Hey Ms. Whoa!"
Today the juniors are working on/should be working on the computers and I have to keep making rounds to make sure they are doing their assignment, not poking people on Facebook or throwing cows at people or whatever it is you can do on there. Some try to be sneaky, keeping it open in a separate window BEHIND an academic-looking website...but this kids don't understand how close to them I am. Not physically, although nothing is funnier that sneaking up behind an unsuspecting student commenting on someone's profile picture and getting right over their shoulder to say "What'cha DOOOOin?" No, I mean I'm close to where they are in life. It was only recently that I was hiding MY facebook page in my college courses as anal teachers surveyed the classroom...so I KNOW their tricks, I've DONE their tricks, I'm BETTER at their tricks. It's kind of like the kids who have their textbooks propped open in their laps and yet both hands are twittling behind the cover. I know you're texting because you aren't blind and we don't have braille text books...plus it looks kind of inappropriate if you don't realize what they are doing.
The one thing these Juniors have mastered is the art of the excuse. About 4 kids have claimed that they are completely incapable of doing their assignment for various reasons. "All my stuff is on this memory card and these computers are too old to read it"..."I have my interview recorded on my phone and I don't have headphones to listen to it"..."Writing is so much harder than just talking". In fact one student just claimed that his nose was stuffing up and he couldn't breathe. As these symptoms just suddenly came on, he recommended that I let the teacher know that the assignment produced physical ailments and that he should be excused from completing it.
Clearly these kids have practice at manipulating teachers. At the beginning of period 4, another class of Juniors, I stated, "No facebook. I can see it from where I am sitting" as I looked at a kid updating his status across the room. Of course it was MY student that I tutor who chimed in, "Well then YOU can't go on facebook either!" My honest response was that I wouldn't be going on anyway, as the teacher I was currently subbing for was undoubtedly online and would wonder why I wasn't tending to her class. "Turn off your online box!" one student shouted. "Go invisible and don't post anything new!" another joined. I laughed as it took a few moments for one to comment..."you're facebook friends with our teacher?!" Oh if only they knew how much of their behavior I REALLY share with their teachers. But that's the life of a sub. You are constantly open for any questions, manipulated into changing assignments and expected to not care. They don't realize that the sub who "wouldn't take the time to write a negative sub report" discusses the play by play of the day with their teacher the next day at lunch!
Another fun game? Guess Ms. Ryder's age. It only takes a small comment about my past at LGHS for students to say "What year did you graduate? How old are you?" I never tell them; I'm too afraid if they knew they would look at me differently. So far, I've gotten anywhere from 25-29. I've even been asked if I'm married or if I have children. One 15 year-old male Spanish student even went so far as to ask me if I would consider dating a younger man, with a wink. It's cute, but ridiculous- then I think of they ways I not-so-subtly flirted with my high school subs and I remember it's more of a game than any legitimate interest. So I say let them have their fun until it gets out of hand. Until then, I frequently use a quote from the movie "17 Again" when the principal says "Thank you for that flattering...yet extremely inappropriate...compliment."
Freshman are the easiest class- the students always fall into one of two categories: scared or hyper. The hyper ones take a bit of calming down, but overall, they are tamable. This class today was mostly in this category. After I yelled at them to quiet down (and threatened to turn off the movie and make them write an in-class essay instead), I offered them all some of my Easter candy to "sweeten" them up. Two Benefits: I get to be the nice sub and they save me from the inevitable chocolate binge that is only one upsetting event away. Overall, I'd say today was a successful day. Now I look forward to subbing Thursday AND Friday which of course means I get to take the kids to the spirit rally. Thought this will ultimately lead to me reminiscing about my glory days, I think it will be fun...and loud. Very loud. Bring it on, kiddos!
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